If you must, I understand.

This is a short story I just wrote. I was limited to two pages and the only direction I was given was that it should be about Loneliness and Longing. I was going to write about Lego's and Licorice, but I was in a more romantic mood.


If You Must, I Understand

Dear Jasmine,
The reasons I miss you are all so powerful, pure, and chaste, I feel it borders on blasphemy to in any way rank or stratify them. But were I forced, (and I assure you I would much rather have a gun to my head than endure this incessant longing that is my constant companion now that we are apart) I would say that it is your smell that has been most enduring in my memory. Call it hormones, pheromones, or chemistry, as soon as you came up to me with your sweet vanilla mango scent, I was transported to a place far away from the monotony of what my daily life has become. Your smell has stayed with me, and reminds me every moment of what it was like to touch you and feel you close to me.
Your smooth skin is remembered for its clarity and perfect tone, complemented nicely by the sleek, platinum blonde hair that fell past your shoulders in its wet, wavy curls. My mind is filled with thoughts of the happiness of a thousand paradisiac lifetimes that will be ours I’m sure, as soon as we are together again. I cannot rid you from my mind, a feeling I’m sure you are also experiencing, for a love this strong and immaculate, these emotions so pure and powerful, can be nothing less than the meeting of two instant soul mates. I love you. I need to be with you.
I was captivated by the way you moved, your grace a prowling lioness bold and intent on its prey. It lured me in, and now I am yours without thought of consequence or requital, only confidence in what I now know to be my kismetic destiny.
I was hesitant when my friends convinced me to go out with them, but now I shudder in horror at what my life would have become had I not gone with them to the club and met you. I’ve never met anyone whom I’ve felt so at ease with, so comfortable and easy to flirt with. I will see you again. I must.
You captured my attention so completely I didn’t even mind spending all that money on you. But tonight wasn’t about the alcohol, or the dancing, it was about you. And me. Together.
I never wanted to leave. I can’t stand being away from you. I followed you backstage because I knew how much it would hurt when you left and I wasn’t prepared for that. I didn’t know that you would be coming back out to perform again. When the bouncer grabbed me, I felt he was trying to pull me away from life itself. I don’t know if you saw the struggle, you were so startled by the security guard’s reaction when I touched you that you took off on a full sprint, high heals and all. Perhaps one of the other girls can tell you about it, I did not let you go without a fight.
The back of the police car embodied all the things that you will never be. Rough, hard, and uninviting. But when you have love in your life nothing is unendurable and what is thirty days when afterwards we can be together forever? Until then, I do not think you should visit me and see me in here, but if you must I understand.
I write with a love more capable than any Eros himself ever dreamt.

-Louis